Candy Corn and Bar Nuts

I haven't talked about food in quite some time. So when I came across this redneck trail mix at a bar on Sunday, I thought it the perfect opportunity to share.

So there I was, minding my own business and watching the Redskins blow hard, when I see this dispenser in the corner. It was one of those dispensers that you'd normally see in a cafeteria that holds cereal. I was a few deep and hungry at this point, so I made my way over to the dispenser. What do I see? Candy corn and beer nuts. Straight up salted peanuts and candy corn that was probably purchased before Halloween of 2006.

Now I wondered, shall I go hungry or shall I destroy my taste buds with this surely disgusting treat in an untrustworthy bar? I voted the latter.

So as I'm reaching into the now full paper tray provided by the barkeep, I deeply inhale the putrid smoke filled air and hope that it's not the last thing I taste on this earth. I take a bite. The salty peanut hits me like any salty peanut would. Not in the way you fall asleep on the couch and your friends through peanuts at you from across the room to try and make it in your mouth. No, they hit me with the saltiness only a peanut could. Then, oh so subtly, the candy corn crept under my teeth and onto my tongue. The combination was magnificent.

As a moral to this taste explosion, I advise all to not judge one bar snack by it's eerie cover. Enjoy said bar snacks with an open mind, as I should have, and you will be rewarded.

Well, not every time. Sometimes you'll eat some shitty food.