4.03.2010

What Women Want

First off, no this isn't a review of the smash hit starring "Braveheart" and "She wasn't that ugly in Twister". No, no today I'll be talking about something I'm sure some guys out there agree with me on.

To preface, my bookmarks for Firefox show up right below the address bar on my browser, and the first icon I see is Yahoo!. Reading Yahoo!, I have to expect shitty writing from sports, music, movies, and just reporting on events, but you HAVE to know the "opinion" articles are going to be really bad.

Case in point, this little ditty here.

Right off the bat, the title is: Top 15 Dating mistakes Guys Make ...so you know it's gonna be something good. And it's written by some pseudonymous woman (or effeminate male) under the name 'stylecaster'.

..sigh.

Let's go through their list shall we?

1. Overly possessive
Ok so I'm not saying that I'm possessive, or that any guy by normal standards is possessive. I think the problem with this woman's statement is that there are at least two different perceptions of "possessive" in play here. For a woman, I can see it as a guy being too quick to jump the relationship forward to "committed" or borderline in love. But the other side of that is, why would a guy be driven to be possessive? Does he have a past history with chicks being snatched up by other guys, or has his past lovers run off with a dentist or something? Does his current lady have a history of leaving relationships because of other men? The real issue here is does the guy have REASON to be possessive.
Dismiss this "mistake" and move on.

2. Gross living space
Yea ok show me a girl who lives in an apartment with other people (no one lives on their own in the real world, and if they do, they have a cleaning lady.... rich mother fuckers) and I'll show you a "gross living space". I have seen some bathrooms exclusively for girls in an apartment and they are WORSE than the hell hole that is currently situated about 15 feet to my left. Dismissed.

3. Acting like a tough guy
Guys are pretending to be "harder" than they really are just to impress a girl? She says, "...why do some guys start stupid, unnecessary scuffles?" and it makes me wonder if she thinks she's dating Tyler Durden or something. Maybe I don't get out enough but if there's a fight, there's a reason for it. Dismissed.

4. Acting differently around your friends
The only thing I have to contribute here is that if a guy likes you, he's gonna show just an ounce of emotion more than what he normally shows. When a guy is with his friends, it's immediately a different scenario. Sure I could say there's testosterone around (which there is) but It's not even that! If I wanna play video games, tell racist jokes and drink beer on a Friday night with my friends, then that's what I'll do. I'm not gonna talk to you or make you feel welcome because of that. Grudgingly accepted.

5. Saying they'll do XYZ with no follow through
We gotta say something for you to take your pants off! Am I right or am I right?
But in all seriousness, she talks about a cell phone or something, I wasn't paying attention, but if we wanted to call you, we would. And if we wanted you to know that we had no intention of calling you, do you think we would tell you? Dismissed.

6. Flirting with/checking out other women
Well maybe you should hit the gym. Dismissed.

7. Baby talk in bed
In my past experience, girls DO want a little baby talk here and there. and the venue doesnt matter. So unless we're doing the no pants dance, I would see no reason to avoid baby talk. Grudgingly Accepted

8. Expecting her to act like your mother
Then you better not expect us to "protect you" or "keep you safe".
We want you to "make me a damn sandwich" because you want us to be there for you when you're scared. And besides, who let you out of the kitchen long enough to write this shitty Yahoo! article? Quickly Dismissed.

9. Letting your friends dictate your life
Ok I agree you shouldn't let you're friends dictate your life, but practice what you preach! I was dumped because the girls friends didn't like me. So, like you said, discuss your relationship with your significant other. Agreed, but with an exception.

10. Threatened by her job
What job? I'll give you a job to do. Dismissed.

..that was terrible.
11. Hypocritical standards
See #9. Dismissed.

12. Not having your own life away from her
It's starting to sound like she ran out of ideas. I already covered this one, practice what you preach. See #9. Dismissed.

13. Bringing up previous relationships
I won't argue it. agreed

14. Treating others poorly
How is this a dating mistake? I was definitely right, she ran out of ideas here. Obviously it's a "red flag" if he treats people badly, but don't you think you should realize that before you're dating? You're an idiot.

15. Inflated ego
I'm just gonna go ahead and agree here too, but at the same I don't to, strictly because of that "overcompensating for something" remark she makes at the end. No decision.

Well all in all, that's what I get for reading fuckin Yahoo! articles.

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